all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
It's been 5 months since I last wore a condom.
Not including when spray tanning
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
I am sitting here. Drinking from a bottle of vodka. Eating shredded cheese from a bag and waiting on him to pick me up after he finishes with his girlfriend. This is what dreams are made of.
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
I think I gotta smoke less weed, I'm getting to lazy to fuck my girlfriend
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