i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
He called me piss drunk at 7:30pm while cooking bacon and said he was going to bed. I don't think he's taking it well.
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
You should never be more than a quarter of a mile from a working toilet
Preach!
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
Do you think my laundromat will notice that the bloodstain on my sheets is in the shape of a face?
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
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