this party is like a fast-foward into the future when im 40 and married with children
I'm too hungover for some lady to talk to me about potatoes
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
You know youre getting old when you I.D. the person trying to take you home to be sure they're over 25. Help me.
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