It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
You didn't say, "No." And you stole more than half of my Snickers. You owed me that dick.
I found our waiter on grindr, gave him my number, and got him to send a dick pic. Still not getting laid but close enough?
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
We exchanged snapchat usernames instead of numbers. Is that what America has come to?
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
It's like "hey I give your roommate blowjobs twice a week, want to connect on LinkedIn?"
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
Randomize
