I think I died a long time ago.
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
Yeah like stabbing myself through the eye with a coffee stir and bleeding out all over the office rug
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
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