i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
Dude my date hates me, Im on a rooftop full of Turkish people, and Ricky Martin is blasting on the radio. I was wrong earlier when I said I have my shit together
After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
This is the high leading the old right now
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
I smell like Dick and happiness
One can only be this extremely wet once a year and I feel like I'm bitch slapping god by not using this gift he has bestowed on me.
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