the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
I woke up this morning with a bag of pepperonis in my bed.... and my facebook status was "pepperonis"
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
He told me I was his first American. I feel like I should've brought a flag to plant on him.
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
Did I, at any point last night, say I was dying?
Randomize
