His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
This wedding is gonna be a disaster. I already had to turn down one of the groomsmen who offered me $100 to sleep with him next wknd.
Too low?
Yes.
Just lectured your brother about using condoms when hooking up with girls he meets online. I should be a fucking life coach
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
I'm sorry I keep drunk texting your boyfriend sports updates.
That's okay. He needs friends too.
Celebrated Veteran's Day by getting a Marine (who just got back from deployment in the middle east) drunk and laid for the first time in 6 months. #Murica
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
Randomize
