She announced her abortion via fbk
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
Listen up tinkerbell, You're gonna come to the bar, hit on some fat chicks, and step up when I punch someone in the face.
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
Underoos and an IDGAF attitude: all you need to successfully win at life
(Underoos optional)
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
Randomize
