if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
turns out I still hate jay leno...even at 10pm.
You stressed the importance of not breaking the seal too early... and then proceeded to piss your pants when you sneezed.
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
Well I'm 2 for 2 with the absinthe, I just woke up in some random car behind the bar
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
My fridge broke, and apparently the back is missing. The repair guy just fixed it with a pizza box. I didn't ask where the box came from, but it wasn't mine. Reason #20 why rent is cheap.
Tequila, beer, rum, gin, and vodka all mixed in my body last night. The whole "never turn down free booze" is catching up to me. Hungover = understatement of the year.
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
I'm like an air traffic controller of women. It's a very similar job. Well spaced and gentle landings are good. When they meet, it's bad. Explosions bad. Dying screaming burning children bad.
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
Randomize
