...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
Im telling you now. Hang out with winning football players and you get whatever the hell you want. Sorry to wake you. But its important knowledge.
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
I love having a boyfriend. I just ate pancakes with regular syrup and chocolate syrup, I havent shaved my legs in a week, and Im still going to get laid tonight.
fuck. you.
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
He followed me on twitter after I posted a drunk screen shot of a tweet. It's like he gave me permission to stalk him on a whole different level.
I just dried my bra with your hair straightener because the drier is broken again.
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
And I might have stolen a bag of Doritos out of Matt's car and hid them in my bag and gave individual chips out to people dancing, trying to convince people they were mini tacos.. Like why Am I allowed to be an adult
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
I tried to steal a Mike's Hard sign last night but it didn't work out
why what happened?
Well it was going fine.. until the bouncer noticed the three foot steel lemon sticking out of my jacket.
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Randomize
