i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
They only remember me when they're drunk...I'm like a suppressed memory.
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
Hey is it bad when your boss leans over your desk and tells you "you smell like the Rainforest Cafe"??
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
Saying we were separated at birth, got on a ship and sailed here via onion barrel from Somalia didn't help our case at all....
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
Has my life seriously led me to day drinking on a Monday the third week of the semester?
It's after 5, it's not day drinking.
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
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