Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
my boss said she was surprised to see me this morning. i told her there's a time in a girls life she has to give up day drinking in order to make money for next weekend's alcohol. she looked so proud, i think i might get a raise.
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
I'm warming McDonald's pies on my heater cause I'm too high for the microwave.
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
He texted his hospitalized grandma while inside me, so really a perfect gentleman.
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
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