u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
Nyc is like a mosaic of my failed dates.
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
From now on he's gonna have to shave first. It feels like I got eaten out by a chainsaw!
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
Randomize
