Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
Cancel that soberness update. I just almost fell down in the security line
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
HURRY. I NEED DRUNK. MORE DRUNK.
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
I think someone tried to make a huge bowl of ramen in my bathtub. There's noodles everywhere in my bathroom.
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
Well, I'll handle this like I always do. Black the fuck out, make out with randoms, give out my number like candy. You know. Standard operating procedure
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
Randomize
