i'd rather walk the sahara in a snuggie with no water than take a bicycle cab
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
I was in the bathroom throwing up...when I walked out he was sitting there watching porn and jacking off. He said, "Sounded like you were gonna be in there for a while."
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
Even my fuck buddy told me I needed a boyfriend. Fml.
I let a drunk straight girl spank me with a metal paddle at the bar tonight. Remind me to never do that again.
In the last 2 hours I managed to have romantic starlit sex on the beach as the tide came in with not only just a gorgeous man, but one who happens to be Eastern European and finishing Harvard law school.
Oh wow. I want to be you right now.
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
Randomize
