And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
Some drunk guy thought my knee scooter was the sexiest thing he's ever seen. He then proceeded to ask me about duck hunting and decoys...
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
Can I come take down that wallpaper yet? I stopped seeing that dude and I need to occupy my time with something besides getting drunk at bingo night and cussing out old people. Also, i'm not sure on the legal stipulations but I might have, unintentionally, committed grand theft auto at some point.
If I wear a tail on Halloween, how am I supposed to grind? Maybe I will just wear devil horns
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
Just a reminder- you dropped broccoli in my car and then felt bad for it and named him Henry
I know. I miss henry.
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
Randomize
