I thought the fact that I took home a 42 year old with 3 kids would excuse my tardiness this morning because my boss is also 42 and has 3 kids. Boy was I wrong.
Do you think unemployment will give me a christmas bonus?
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
Their children would look like the Michelin man and smell like chef Boyardee
Ate 5 hotdogs today. You need to get me back on my tequila diet cause this shit has to stop!
Did you pee in the oven last night??
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
Randomize
