do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
I just turned in a 4 page paper spelling absolute as "absolut" every single time. I'm an alcoholic
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
You kept screaming how great you were at drawing poptarts and you insisted on drawing them all over my forearm
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
This guy is trying to get me to do some acrobatic gymnast shit just so he can see "my tight hole." I'm too big to be sweating in my own damn bed. Shittttt.
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
I came twice and when I was done I petted his head and said "you did good kid you did good" and just laid back smiling. Tell me I'm not awesome.
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
Randomize
