Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
oh hey summer self, welcome to endless thirsty thursdays and walks of shame.
I was so scared, I actually heard my grandmother's voice in my head saying if I get pregnant, then my vagina will fall off. And then I'm going to die.
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
Have 7 min to kill while I wait for liquor store to open. Feels really awkward.
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
Didn't know where your dishes went. Put em in the bathtub. They're stacked taller than you. It's like modern art.
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
Randomize