Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
Theres a handprint of sauce on my frig, one streaked across my face, a trail of it to my bedroom and sauce all in my bed and i have no idea what the fuck i ate.
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
So awkward... The newspaper lady just caught me sitting stoned in my driveway at 5 am and asked if I was okay. I'm way better than ok right now
Well, on the plus side, the hospital gave me a shirt that says "Makes a bad ass look good"
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
I think I accidentally invented a religion.
I'd give anything to be driving a pirate ship wearing nothing but a coconut bra and a grass skirt eating a pizza and watching dolphins jump in the waves. Dreams ya gotta have dreams
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
Randomize
