I just came out of my doctor's office and i look into the window and i see a guy sitting in the front seat getting head.
why are you so shocked? you live in brooklyn.
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
I just realized I have my pepper spray, gun, and vibrator all in one drawer. One false grab and I'm screwed either way.
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
I just had to pick up my "let's drink and make bad choices" hat, my banana suit and beer pong table from work. Until just then I couldn't figure out why I got fired.
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
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