you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
Important detail I forgot to tell you: leprechaun loves david bowie.
It's like God shit irony all over that family
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
I'm going to book club and then I'm going to get laid. Being in your 20s ain't so bad sometimes.
Randomize
