I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
Disregard everything I texted you last night. Oh, and disregard me hooking up with your boyfriend.
Apparently walking into a national conference and proclaiming "i'm here to fuck shit up" is frowned upon.
Who knew?
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
Randomize
