You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
is this the sara with the beer cane?
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
someone lit off fireworks while I puked in the street. I was like congratulating me for making it through homecoming.
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
constantly striving to make life awkward and more complicated, one drunk bone at a time.
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
If you could come do me into like a 12 hour coma that'd be great
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
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