Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
Why did I think it was so necessary to steal that rolling pin?
You passed out and she managed to carry you all the way back to your dorm last night. I believe your testicles now her property.
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
Your topless pictures make me question reality
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
Don't take advice from me. I'm simultaneously shitting and eating cheesecake.
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
I slapped a guy during sex last night because he moaned the wrong name. Then I remembered I gave him a fake name. Sorry bro.
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
Had a dream last night that we survived the apocalypse. And we celebrated Christmas.
What did I get you?
A 12 gauge and a bottle of vodka that was waist high.
Sounds about right
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