Would it be weird if I brought slabs of bacon with me to the beach?
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food.
When I tell my children how I survived hurricane Sandy I'll probably leave out the threesome
Well, I'm hung over and my penis hurts - two signs of success
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
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