This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
Like your dick isn't Beyoncé, it doesn't get close ups
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
He can move his dick. Like on its own. WHY DID I NOT GIVE BLOWJOBS BEFORE?!
I know you can't find me. Somehow I ended up on the roof smoking a cig with the strippers that are on break. Way too drunk to deal with this right now.
Randomize
