i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
well seeing as i got a call at 5 am from the hotel manager telling me my cousin was passed out on the lobby floor...not good
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
Im gonna go lick parts of my apartment. Good night and be ever vigilant, you never know when I'm coming to epoxy your hand to you nipple.
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
I am convinced you could sleep through the apocalypse and only wake up because youre hungry & want Dominoes
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
Randomize
