If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
I am sleeping on the floor in your room so if you have sex in here just don't roll on me
If i ever have a kid with an outie i'm giving it up for adoption
Hold on, I gotta pump breast milk for the white russians.
Come to me. Jacob is confessing his love and all I want is a hot dog. With chili. Not love.
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
I guess I could probably fit that in between deep self reflection and teenage mutant ninja turtles
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
I could be doing way worse things besides texting him 'come over and bang my headache away'. i could be on meth
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