Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
it's a little hard to watch the basketball games with my family considering they keep cheering for the guy that i had a one night stand with...
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
Fucked her within an inch of her life. Seriously. Don't choke bitches when they ask. Was way too drunk to be pulling that shit.
This hangover is way worse than all my relationships
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
I thought my neighbors locked me out of the building. Then I remembered I was drunk. PUSH AND TURN.
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
Randomize
