I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
Thanks for not locking your door. I had to pee and there was a random person throwing up in my bathroom so I used yours. \nPS I stole your soap
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
new low: I blocked him from seeing my snapchat story in hopes he will text me because he'll be afraid I'm dead or something
And it only took a fake engagement ring, a condom and a bowl of weed
Randomize
