he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
We're the kind of people who ruin family vacations
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
I thought he was being really sweet and protective when he pulled me away from the guy i was hooking up with, but turns out he just wanted me to get chicken nuggets with him...
I ran into my boss at the liquor store on our lunch hour we both just stood there awkwardly until i was like your car bar or mine hahaha we both need a cab
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
I might volunteer to give breath samples on the 17th where I would be required to get drunk and then give samples! THE POLICE WOULD PAY ME AND PROVIDE THE ALCOHOL!
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
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