she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
guess who's eating a vending machine cheese danish, has no panties on, and is still the classiest bitch at this bus stop?
Just stole a goat. Bringing it to your house to cock block. Blame the goat not me.
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
apparently my buddy was fucking on our couch downstairs so i decided it was necessary to walk downstairs naked in a hockey mask.
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
Failing this, see a doctor for elephant tranquillisers, to be taken with whiskey orally, twice at dawn.
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
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