I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
She def said "you had your chance!" after telling me she had a boyfriend. Like a pile of dogshit lecturing me on how I missed out on having itself stuck to the bottom of my shoe.
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
Because when I say 'You shouldn't drink anymore', she hears, 'I personally challenge you to chug 3 more mixed drinks'
You kept asking who was the good cop and who was the bad cop, you said you only wanted to talk to the good one
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
I'm currently bartering with this guy so I can fuck his bi girlfriend. We're at 5 pizzas and he gets to watch us make-out.
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
just woke up on the floor with a bottle in my hand. and by bottle, i mean a baby bottle. half filled with tequila.
Randomize
