If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
Just found out I called my mom at six in the morning to ask where the bong was. I win.
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
I've reached the gravitational age where it's very hard to get my face and my boobs in the same shot without some kind of yoga involved .
all his sexual metaphors involve condiments, should I worry?
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
It's not my fault you decided to fall in love with a Frodo Baggins lookalike
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
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