I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
Just stabbed myself in the face trying to lick melted cheese off a kitchen knife.
At least you got a round of applause for dancing like vanilla ice across the street and into the bar. Even as you were getting carded
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
Also, since I switched back to this phone I've found a crop of dick pics and your funeral arrangements.
I think I'm getting sponsored by the Mexican Drug Cartel for the start of my poker career. It was an interesting night at the bar. One word, Vegas.
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
Randomize
