On the back of that comment, I've formed a theory that as a result of my brainwashing your drunk self actually believes that beards are your calling.
when seducing a hipster, do you think taking a nude pic on a lomo-camera app would increase my chances? grainy off-colored boobs and telling him how much i like reading salinger?
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
On a not really funny at all but kinda brighter note I've gotten really good at texting in hand cuffs
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
did i just pee glitter
If you gave someone an std. would you say a muffin basket, a candy gram or an edible arrangement is a better choice to send them?
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
It’s a dick. Seen one, seen em all. Unless it spews a fountain of tequila, I don’t need to see yours.
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