That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
You really need to take down the pics of you and your boyfriend on facebook. It's becoming increasingly harder to jerk off while i'm Facebook stalking your pics at 2am.
dude, she was giving me a lapdance and her thong had a skid mark. no I did not hit it.
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
Can I have him when you're done?
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
also somebody did cough syrup and i was really worried but i couldn’t express why properly so i was like MACKLEMORE SAYS NO
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
Bring me pizza. I'll trade you your underwear you left here for 2 slices.
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
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