You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
Def ran into my elementary school babysitter at the grocery store. Still hot. And she complimented my beer choice. It feels good to still have her approval
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
"Like what guy would respond to 'let's fuck. I've got bagels'??"
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
Why is no one on Snapchat tonight? I want to see other people having fun so I know it still exists.
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
Randomize
