Take a Tylenol with a HUGE glass of water before you pass out, you'll thank me in the morning.
i dony have tylonal but i had a snickers and popcorn and a bottle of water and i am.. brushing my teeth!
Her mom drove me home after I blew a .13 So there I am wishing her mom a happy mother's day sitting in the passenger seat where I just banged her daughter 15 min prior
i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
I just got off a plane from Mexico. At least 15 passengers dashed to the bathroom throughout the flight. Can you tell its spring break?
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
Never go to your parents' super bowl party. I learned, in great detail, "Why Aunt Trisha is a hoe" Not enough beer on the eastern seaboard.
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.
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