people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
She called my landing strip a "vagina mohawk"....
Lesbians are weird.
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
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