I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
I don't appreciate you drunk dressing passed-out me in spandex for bed
Well the nurse forgot to take all my stitches out, so my surgical tools are peroxide, kitchen scissors, fingernail clippers, a pocket knife, and 11 beers. Let's do this...
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
Its hard to hear the music in here over his nasal whistle. And his breath smells like old milk. I think I need more vodka, and he better be buying. You owe me.
You stood outside his house all night throwing your sister's leftover Easter eggs and singing 'now you're just somebody that I used to blow'
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
Just dropped the most perfectly rolled joint into the toilet I just finished taking a shit in, hadn't even had time to flush, 5 second rule?
No!
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
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