went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
We were escorted through the guys dorm by 5 kids with nerf guns and zelda shields. I felt like the president with a fucked up secret service squad.
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
look, im sorry that i yelled at your little brother, threw my car keys at him and smashed a stale cookie with a pool cue, but i swear to god i didn't poop on the floor. it was one of your dogs.
Someone just said “I need to use up this money before I’m tits up under the dirt” so I think I’m going to start using that in my daily vocabulary.
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
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