Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
What's everyones problem with my costume?!
It looks like a unicorn came on your face.
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
My friend asked me if I got home okay and I replied "Glad teat. Goodnight." Usually I can translate drunk me, but I'm even lost on that one.
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
Have you ever eaten pizza and gotten your dick sucked at the same time? Because I have pizza.
He texted "fuck you" before blocking me on all social media. Come to think of it, that's also the last thing my mother said to me. Could it be that I'm the problem?
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
Randomize
