It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
I learned something last night. Strippers can be on house arrest?
What's more sad than going to Target to buy Plan B and the new Sam Smith album?
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
Randomize
