Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
He was sitting on the bathroom floor, swirling his finger in the toilet singing the Laguna Beach theme song. I don't know whether to laugh or help him.
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
"DO YOU LIKE FLYING KITES" WORKED AS A PICKUP LINE. SUCK IT.
Our apt smells like hot shit marinated in oregano and cumin. No more taco truck dinner, fuck face. The wall paper is peeling.
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
Randomize
