it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
I think I pulled my groin stumbling back from the bar. That or the hippo I woke up next to.
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
I can't wet the bed. That was the old me. I'm grown
Oh my god
...there was a woman in the stall next to me in the Walmart bathroom having a massive bowl movement and whispering "I'm sorry" over and over
Had to snap chat three different people to ask who left the bite mark on my thigh. All three said "Wasn't me". Now I can't wear a bathing suit to my mom's pool.
YOUR STATE IS STUPID
Did you miss a turn again?
WHAT FUCKING IDIOT DECIDED TO DESIGN AN ENTIRE FUCKING STATE WHERE YOU CAN'T MAKE A FUCKING LEFT TURN?!? FUCK NEW JERSEY
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
Randomize
