I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
woke up this morning with a fat chick but she went downstairs and made pancakes without saying a word.
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
he texted me at 3am asking for "one of my famous blowjobs"
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
I woke up with masking tape on my nipples this morning........... WHY DO BAD THINGS HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
I just got free tacos, you would be so proud of me.
Clarification, I got free tacos without performing any sexual favors.
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
Randomize
