I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
she always made me post sex PB&Js it was like fucking a trashier Martha Stewart
At what point in time did you think it was ok to jizz in my hair while I slept??
Around the time you told me my brothers dick was bigger.
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
I found a 9 minute video on my phone of you singing into an eggplant.
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
Randomize
